I'm 34

Since Andrew was getting baptized on May 2^nd, and I didn’t want to distract from his special day, I opted to celebrate my birthday on May 1^st. I didn’t mind turning 34 a day early ;)

Everything was going great. My mom and dad came down to spend the day with me. My mom took me shopping to Rod Works and then we hit the mall. I got some great shoes and a quilt kit that I’ve had my eye on for a while. I felt like a princess.

After we were done shopping we went home and visited for a while and then the kids got home from school. It wasn’t too much later that Paul came home. He left work early just for me.

I had asked Paul for some cash for my birthday and wasn’t expecting any surprises. He went above and beyond and surprised me with a very beautiful, very unique flower arrangement. He went to the florist and picked the flowers for it himself.

We all went to dinner together at Zupas. I loved my meal (No this isn't all mine!) and was having a great time.

We went home where I blew out the candles on my donuts and opened the presents that I had gotten that afternoon from my parents. I was on cloud nine. So far it was a perfect day.

Unfortunately it ended on a very sour note. (That is actually a gross understatement) I am still so hurt that even writing this is painful. (It took me this long to even want to try to write about it.) I won’t go into details but my special day was ruined. I feel like I was tricked, I got my feelings hurt, and was very let down by people I love. Now when I look back I feel like there is a black cloud hanging over that day (Sadly it followed me into Saturday) and it kills me. I want to remember the good parts but right now all I can think about are the bad parts. There was no way to resolve the problem and that makes it even harder. I wish I could go back in time and have a do over but that isn’t how life works. It breaks my heart and I am still aching over it. The pain I am feeling is going to follow me around for a very long time.